Collaborative Culture

If a school wants to transform a culture, everyone in it must value conversation

By Susan Scott and Angela Brooks-Rallins

August 2012

Vol. 33 No. 4

Our school, which serves urban youth, is in Chicago’s South Loop. We have stakeholders in the building on any given day, touring the school and meeting with or learning from staff. At the end of those meetings, one common theme becomes evident: There is a culture of calm, safety, and care in our school. Visitors consistently remark on the feeling they get when they walk into the building and share statements made by students and staff that they feel cared for. As I reflect on how this culture came about, I realize relationships had to be built. The leadership team and I knew we needed to allow stakeholders to work together each day to build trusting relationships. During the first week of school, the staff

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Authors

Susan Scott and Angela Brooks-Rallins

Angela Brooks-Rallins is principal of Perspectives Charter School Rodney D. Joslin Campus in Chicago. Joslin serves 6th- to 12th-grade youth in the city of Chicago, with 98% of students graduating and going to college.

In each issue of JSD, Susan Scott ([email protected]) explores aspects of communication that encourage meaningful collaboration. Scott, author of Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success At Work & In Life, One Conversation at a Time (Penguin, 2002) and Fierce Leadership: A Bold Alternative to the Worst “Best” Practices of Business Today (Broadway Business, 2009), leads Fierce Inc. (www.fierceinc.com), which helps companies around the world transform the conversations that are central to their success. Fierce in the Schools carries this work into schools and higher education. Columns are available at www.lf.wphlab.com. © Copyright, Fierce Inc., 2012.

While no single conversation is guaranteed to change the trajectory of a school, a student, a relationship, or a life, any single conversation can. If only we understood what a conversation is! It comes from the Latin, “conversare,” which means an exchange of ideas and sentiments. Too bad many people don’t have conversations; they have monologues. I recently gave in to an invitation for brunch with a friend who loves me, but who leaves me exhausted and frustrated. True to form, she talked nonstop for two hours, and, even when she asked a question, she interrupted my answer to change topics, prefacing yet another lengthy side trip with, “This probably doesn’t interest you, but…” She was right — it didn’t interest me. And she knew it, but couldn’t stop herself, failed to notice my eyes glaze over, and didn’t hear my silent scream when she said, “Let’s do this again soon” as we parted. I’ve talked with this friend about her tendency to hijack a conversation and go on at length about topics and details that bore me, explained the effect on me, asked her to do less of this, to no avail, so though I won’t cut her out of my life, I won’t spend more one-on-one time with her. My counsel to myself and to you is: Don’t be this woman! Try this today: Don’t talk as much as you usually do. Dial it down 50%. Instead, ask questions. Listen to the answers. Really listen. Ask another question. Say, “Thank you.”

— Susan Scott